haha... just noticed that underbaraclara had blogged about almost the same topic.....well it's nothing new.

One rule.

A very western phenomenon in my eyes is the one where it is soooooo important to place oneself and others in different categories. Its expected of you that you should know exactly what kind of music you like, if you are an animal activist, or if you like putting black makeup on yourself and what type things you avoid like different shops, foods, clothes or people just so that you can define yourself. Like evething else. Even your relations. People tend to reliquish things they like just to fit in some stupid idea of society's box. Or their a box they've created themselves to be an individual. Being an individual is doing things that really give you pleasure without putting handicapping boundries. Its important to see oneself as a person and not a category.

We are aware of universal stereotypes about men and women. I'd like to say the same thing here. Why this division? Pink is feminine, blue is masculine, flowers are feminine, hammers are masculine, women gossip, men don't (haha), women are vain, men aren't, women should be slim, men should have muscles, women don't fart (what the fuck? Its natural), men do......the list is long. Bottomline is there have always been, in my opinion inhumane expectations on women AND men. Most of the time women are looked down upon. Why is the word "ladies" used in a depreciative manner. Many women feel proud to be called "tomboys" but the case is not vice verca. Not even gay men feel comfortable when their sexual orientation is questioned. Why is it aggrading if a woman is called a man and degrading if man is called a woman? Especially womens consumtion is looked down upon. Even men consume ALOT but their consumption is never questioned or even seen as a problem. One thing that bugs me is that feminists always blame the degraded position of women on men and forget that women are no passive creatures when it comes to developing the society. I'd call that chauvinism and the "big" news is that there are as many chauvinist men AS women. Feminism isn't about lifting up women as a higher caste of mankind or about women trying to be men, its about seeing men AND women as persons.

I've allways loved playing with cars, guns and i've even wresteled with my cousin and my brother. I love movies that ususally are categorised as boy movies (not for the reason) and I do fart and burp ALOT (even my boyfriend thinks that i'm disgusting sometimes....hihi), I love everytime I see a muscle popping up on my body, I love eating (no matter where the food is from), I love buing clothes and shoes, I love doing and watching sports, I've always been goal orientated and taken the first step when it comes to guys i've liked in the past and not waited for the guy to come to me, I've allways felt insulted when a man has called me beautiful (never proud as I've felt my personaity to be belittled as its just the genes) I hate making my hair in the morning (which my brother loves to do), am I a tomboy? been called that before and to that I answer that "I am a woman and very proud of if!"

Femininity should be enjoyed, it's nothing to be ashamed of!

Correction! It's called sunshine eyes and not crows' feet!

After a long time I've felt the "munchies" of writing something down. I read my old posts and have come to realise that I've come far. I am the kind of person who says (and writes), a bit too much and things I don't mean. In other words I'm not very smooth with my comments, but thats just me, I often think afterwards.

My life now is so different, other responsibilities but even if I'm working I still kind of lack the feeling of work. And that's a good thing! I guess. Cause if you don't see your work as a liability you can enjoy it on a totally different level. I love my work, but then again I've just been working for about 2 months.

Things change but the most important thing that you don't! However development, mental growth are totally different. Someone once said "Developing is not the same thing as growing old, it is when you stop developing you start to grow old".

I guess that's what they mean with the phrase "to grow old gracefully" AND accepting everything that comes along with it as a gift. I still remember me asking my grandma about when I would get those beautiful lines she had on her face and her silvergrey hair. Why is ageing something to be looked down on. For me these lines are a reminders of a person's wisdom and life experience. So to hell with anti wrinkle creams that awake shame in people for being beautiful.

Ok! I have a confession to make. I'm tired of this blog-thingy. This has always been the problem with me, if I'm not enthusiastic about something all the time or if my enthusiasm dies during a process of something I get bored and tired and my passion vanishes. I can't go on doing stuff I don't like, if I'm not burning for the thing I am doing. And lets admit I haven't been a very active blogger. So now I've tried having a personal blog and a facebook account and discovered that they aren't for me. Bye for now! Who knows maybe I'll write a thing or two when I feel the itch in my hands.

I have no inspiration....I'm stressed out for a change even though my attitude towards life is sound and healthy. I just can't do anything about that I have two tests this week and that I have to travel four hours tomorrow just for a course AND I have to hand in a book summary this week. I'm screwed! And did I mention I hate travelling by trains.

Nightmare

I had such a weird nightmare this morning. In my dream one of my cousins had become a psychopath and tried to burn down our house. When I tried to escape, he set fire on me. This dream was too intense for me and I woke up all sweaty. Normally I forget many details from my dreams but this one was different. Nice way to start a day huh?!

Seriously!

I learnt a new thing today, during my control check-up with gynacologist. It's a male, but really it didn't matter. He asked me if I'd like to take an HPV test, I declined as he took one five years ago. Then he told me about the papillom virus and said that in 99,8 % cases of cervical cancer is this virus involved. In other words women who have been infected by this virus tend to develop cervical cancer later on. He asked me to come and visit only if I have a problem and said in a very nice way that "it is not a chronic disease to be a woman", like the media want us to believe.
So the cervical cancer is a "fruit" of free sexuality....Maybe that's why fucking around is forbidden in some cultures (even if it's done stealthily).

The freedom of using your body the way you wan't is a good thing but the social pressure that comes along with it is maybe the main problem. I remember how I was reminded from time to time about my unconventional sexual behaviour which didn't include kissing random guys or having sex during my adolescence just on trial basis again with a random guy. To share my intimate parts with anybody was just not my cup of tea. But there was this pressure that teenagers used to put on eachother to lose their virginity and brag about how many people they've been with....you get the point!

I hope our coming generations learn that sex is one of the most beautiful things in the world when love and passion are involved in the picture. Call me old fashioned but its worth waiting for, in my opinion. Ok now I'm starting to sound like a 50 year old mom!


Artist: Momar Ndiaye